


birthday wishes

by CapriciousCrab



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Birthday, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Getting Back Together, M/M, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-05 12:14:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17918615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CapriciousCrab/pseuds/CapriciousCrab
Summary: “Happy Birthday, Dan,” he says quietly, fingers twisting nervously around each other. “Um, would it be alright if I came in?”





	birthday wishes

**Author's Note:**

> This is a follow-up to 'happy, happy birthday baby' which was posted back in October for the Bingo Fest, which you can find  
> [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16268828)

 

He waits outside the door with his stomach roiling and hands clammy from nerves. He knows Dan is home; he can see the light spilling out from under the door, so he knocks timidly and waits.  
  
He'd come by earlier after leaving the pub. Seeing Dan unexpectedly at the bar tonight had left him gutted, those tousled curls and warm brown eyes as beautiful as ever. His mouth had gone dry, and his hands had trembled as they locked eyes. He'd yearned for him like nothing before and for a moment he was breathless. Then Liam had turned to him, and the spell was broken.  
  
Leaving Dan behind in the bar had been torture. He'd seen the longing on Dan's face, the painful hope in his eyes before Phil had shaken his head at him before leaving the pub. But he had needed time. Time to think instead of acting rashly, living with the regret of a hasty decision.  
  
Like the day he'd moved out.  
  
He had waited until Dan was gone before sneaking his things out of their flat. His books and movies, candles and such, even the damn golden pig. He couldn't stand the brittle silence they were living in, and Dan had said they were done. So filled with an abundance of stubborn pride and heavy grief, he had left.  
  
Now he was slinking back, hoping that the card he'd slid under the door would be enough to soften Dan enough to let him apologize. He shuffles his feet and rocks a bit back and forth as he wonders if Dan will even answer the door. He knocks again, a bit louder, then he hears the sound of feet dashing toward the door.  
  
The door suddenly flings open and then Dan is there, releasing his name in a trembling, breathless sigh.  
  
“Phil...”  
  
Dan's face is splotchy and wet with tears and still, he's the most beautiful thing Phil's ever seen.  
  
“Happy Birthday, Dan,” he says quietly, fingers twisting nervously around each other. “Um, would it be alright if I came in?”  
  
Dan steps aside and silently waits for Phil to enter, his breath coming quick and shallow. The silence makes him nervous as he crosses the threshold and the door closes behind him. He turns to face Dan, intending to apologize for how everything fell apart but Dan is there, pressing their mouths together in a hot, messy kiss.  
  
Phil pulls in a sharp breath through his nose and suddenly his senses are flooded with a melange of scents; the floral of Dan's shampoo, the woodsy notes of his cologne, even the fruity hint of his lip balm. All blended together in a fragrance that is uniquely Dan. He buries his hands in Dan's hair and lets himself get lost in the kiss. It's at once familiar and new and Jesus Christ, he'll never get enough of it.  
  
He doesn't know how long they stand there pressed against the door but his lips feel a bit raw when he pulls his mouth from Dan's with a gasp. They stare at each other for a heartbeat then Dan's chin wobbles before he bursts into wild sobs as he throws his arms around Phil's neck.  
  
“You left me. You _left_ me!” he cries, his face buried in Phil's neck.“You said you would always be here and then you were just...gone.”  
  
He wants to defend himself, to remind Dan that _he_ was the one who had ended things between them and he feels it prickle in his gut. But when he turns his head to look at Dan's tear-streaked face and feels the solid, familiar weight of his body against his own he can't bring himself to care right now. He presses his cheek against Dan's hair and breathes deep, letting the comfort of holding him in his arms once again sweep over him.  
  
“I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Dan.” he murmurs in his ear, stroking his hands over Dan's shaking shoulders and down his back. He rubs circles there in an attempt to calm and soothe and tries to keep his own breathing even. He can feel himself getting choked up, tears stinging in his eyes that he doesn't want to let fall. “I've missed you so much. Every day without you felt endless.”  
  
Dan shifts in his arms and Phil loosens his hold, watching as Dan takes a step back. His eyelashes are wet with leftover tears, but he gives him watery smile and grabs Phil's hand, pulling him over to the sofa to collapse on the cushions and tug Phil down with him. He sits stiffly, unsure of what to do now that the initial rush of emotion has passed but Dan seems to feel no such restraint, shifting closer to press himself along Phil's side. Dan wraps an arm around his waist and cuddles in and Phil sighs in relief, the affectionate gesture easing some of the tension he feels inside.  
  
He cautiously wraps his arm around Dan's shoulders, and they sit in quiet contemplation for a while. He's not sure what to do now or what to say so he looks around the flat, anxious to see if Dan's made any changes but everything looks as it does the day he left. There are empty spaces where Phil's belongings once stood, stark and somehow lonely, and the pain of that punches him in the gut once again. He rests his head on Dan's and closes his eyes only to snap them open when Dan speaks.  
  
“It's my fault.” Dan's voice is small and hesitant. His fingers pluck restlessly at Phil's shirt, bunching up the material only to smooth it back out. “I'm the one who said we were done, I'm the one who fucked it up.”  
  
“Dan-”  
  
Dan sits up and looks at him square in the face. “No, Phil. You have to let me say it.”  
  
“I don't want you taking all the blame for this,” Phil sighs, rubbing his hands over his face. “It wasn't just you.”  
  
But Dan shakes his head at him. “It was, Phil. I knew what I was doing, I knew I was spiraling and taking it out on you. It was easier to push you away than it was to talk... and then you were gone.” His voice wobbles a bit, but he presses on. “You were gone and I realized just how much I loved you. But it was too late.”  
  
He can't take the distance, small as it is and pulls Dan into his arms again. “It's not too late, Dan. I'm here, we're here, and we can fix this. If that's what you want.” He pushes his fingers through Dan's hair, letting his fingertips drift over his ear before settling around the nape of his neck, massaging the tension from the muscles there and smiling at the sigh it draws from Dan's lips.  
  
“What about the guy from the bar? The one that looked at me like I was something stuck to the bottom of his shoe?” Dan asks bitterly. He's gone stiff in Phil's arms as if bracing himself for a verbal blow.  
  
“That was Liam.”  
  
“Liam,” his voice is distant and flat. “Are you guys, you know-?"  
  
“Dan, we're friends. Nothing more than that,” His voice is soft and gentle and he tries to keep his tone neutral. “He was there for me when I needed someone.”  
  
Dan sags back against the sofa and sighs. “I'm sorry. I know I don't have any right to be upset. It's just there hasn't been anyone else for me and I thought-”  
  
He grabs Dan's hand and brings it to his lips, pressing a light kiss into the palm before curling Dan's fingers over it. “There hasn't been anyone else for me either. You're it for me, Dan.” He watches the surprise and growing joy light up Dan's face and smiles before checking the time. The smile drops from his face as he realizes how late it's gotten. “It's getting late and I should probably go-”  
  
“No, wait! Umm, maybe you could stay?” Dan pleads. He's clinging to Phil's hand now as if he could physically anchor him to his side. “Not for, you know...” he trails off awkwardly, and Phil can't help but laugh.  
  
“Why don't you make us some coffee, and we can talk? Like we used to,” he suggests. “I'd like to spend the rest of your birthday with you if you'll let me.”  
  
Dan laughs softly and stands, pulling Phil up from the sofa. “Phil, I literally wished for you tonight. I've never had a birthday wish come true before and I'm not about to let it slip away from me now.”  
  
The simple admission gets him choked up all over again and he can't help but pull Dan in for a tight hug, lightly rocking them back and forth while he gets his wayward emotions under control. Leaning forward, he presses a soft kiss to Dan's lips and nudges him toward the kitchen. “C'mon birthday boy, let's have some coffee.”

He follows him to the kitchen and watches as Dan makes them coffee, the rhythm of his movements familiar and comforting. He's smiling when he brings the mugs over and Phil can't help but tug him close, kissing him once more.  
  
“Happy Birthday, baby.”

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> You can like/reblog [here](https://capriciouscrab.tumblr.com/post/183047691640/birthday-wishes-rating-t-words-15k) if you'd like :)


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